Life According to Cindy

Day 99 (and counting)*

Stuck in the Grind, Searching for Freedom

It's now day 99 (+) that I've been in the Netherlands without interruption. Ninety-three days too many, if you ask me. 😬

My passport has become a decorative object, my hiking shoes are collecting dust, and I've lost my inner peace somewhere between the Balkans, my apartment, and my workplace.

I feel trapped in gray Netherlands, caught in the daily routine (the grind), as if I'm working against my own nature. It's like asking a bird not to fly and to be kept in a cage. That's not who I am. This doesn't work.

It's not just a nice bonus; it's almost a basic need. I feel restless, unfocused, and completely not myself when I stay in one place for too long. This affects everything, both in my personal life and at work.

What does it bring when I can occasionally escape for a few weeks, 
fly a lot, and be with people I trust? Find out below.....

Still Counting: Day 464 (+) 

Follow-up (February 16th, 2026)

It's funny reading back what I wrote on January 20th, 2025.
Ninety-nine days in the Netherlands felt like an eternity back then  like I was slowly dissolving into routine, paperwork, and gray skies.

And now?
Well… some things have changed.
And some things are exactly the same, just wearing a different jacket.

Yes, I still miss my life on the road.
The camper. The chaos. The absolute freedom of not knowing where I'll sleep tomorrow.
The feeling of being fully alive, fully awake, fully me.

I've learned that I can leave once in a while, escape for a bit, breathe again, fly, reconnect with friends who understand me better than my own calendar ever will.
But those short escapes only remind me of the truth I've always known:
I'm not built for standing still.

I miss the basics, waking up with the sun instead of an alarm.
I miss the mountains judging me lovingly.
I miss the conversations that start with
"Where are you from?"
and somehow end three hours later with
"Wow, I think we just became best friends."

And today, just like back then, I feel that pull.
That itch in my bones.
That quiet whisper that says:
"You're meant to move. You're meant to wander. You're meant to live a life that doesn't fit inside four walls."

Because yes... responsibilities matter.
Life isn't just running away; it's choosing what makes you come alive.
It's choosing wonder.
Curiosity.
Connection.
Memories that don't need filters or captions because the moment itself is unforgettable.

So here I am, months later, still learning, still longing, still dreaming about the road.
Still believing that we're here to discover and be amazed — over and over again.

And if that means my passport becomes my most loyal companion again…
well, it's about time I dust it off.

Now all that's left is to take the step, because the most beautiful things in life are always the ones that scare us the most